Drown Him 

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You weep until you choke on your despairYou wail until the ear drums of your pillows are in shambles

You sow positivity

But reap pain

And your tear ducts have removed their Governor

So you cry Rain

And your umbrella is just an upside down strainer 

You are soaked and the lack of hope

And each night you remove the 10 foot rope

From under your bed

Because if you can’t feel

The pressure from snapping your neck

Will be excruciating

But at least you’ll feel

 before your life is over

You don’t even bother to 

pretend anymore

Your reasons only 

make leaving an open door

Once upon a time you waged war on your depression

But your white flag is

 your last line of defense

You only want happiness

But that request seems so far fetched

Hell is just so far bent on

Rearing its ugly head

Through 

Your subconscious

The one place you thought

 you would be able to escape

So you run

But your thoughts pick up the pace

And it won’t be long

Before they overtake

So why not pump the brakes

And let it do what it will

Blank are your stares 

You no longer have fears

For fears would be a break

From what actually terrifies you

Yourself. 

It’s you

And the misinterpretation

Of your strength 

Your insecurities stifle your potential 

But object at rest will stay at rest

Unless you move them into motion 

And realize that sometimes

You will be the only one

To help you power your boat

 across the ocean

Yes

The very one you’ve concocted with your tears 

The very same one you have to choose not to drown in 

Your anxiety and depression

They chant drown him

But what they don’t know

Is that your will is astounding

That microcosm of power

Your iota of a determination

Will be all you need to succeed

In being free

From yourself

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Torched 

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The Women carry torches The Sea of fire will 

Burn men alive 

If the women get a hold of them

Hurt women

Mad at a man and them selves

Mad that his same old tired tricks worked

Mad that she allowed herself to get hurt

Mad that he didn’t undress her heart before he undressed her shirt

And the love he claimed he had

Slipped off before her skirt slipped and hit the floor

He won. 

She lost. 

And now she’ll spend her life telling the world that men are no good

I’m not saying she’s wrong

I’m saying one can’t tango alone

It takes two to get along

But it’s not her fault he switched his song

And his re-mix

Was read this

He didn’t love her with his heart

He loved her with his penis

And I know that’s vulgar

But so are all of her late nights 

Praying her tears are enough to

Eradicate the pain from her body

As he collects hearts for hobbies

He brought it to his room but

Left his good intentions in the lobby

And she hates herself for

She swore she would never become a victim

A victim to a wolf

I’m not claiming to understand women

I’m just saying that

I’m also concocted of feelings 

And can understand that

Emotional baggage should at least be worth a misdemeanor

But to her it’s worth nothing

Because she

Not he must live with this pain 

See 

Dudes are playing the same old games

And Shorties are still falling for them 

It’s cyclical

And It won’t ever be better

Until men become better

And women expect better

The Ghost of Ms. Jones

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She’s lost everything Her heart continues to break 

In so much that she’s 

Left the broken fragments of it 

All over the floor like 

Elephants in a pottery shop 

She no longer desires 

To pick up the pieces…

She feels that 

Every time she super glued her soul 

And caulk fixed the cracks in her heart 

It would be ripped 

Right from the mould 

And the heart she once had of gold 

Is withering away 

With memories being the 

Only entity to keep her going…

Blood is all over her floors 

Stained from the days 

Where

She walked over the shards of 

Her Heart 

And the suns rays 

Casts shades of gray 

I mean shades of pain 

I mean blades of flames 

And she’s not even sure 

She doesn’t want to be consumed…

She perseveres 

But in trying to keep her composure 

She’s prone to 

Burst in to tears 

And her pain shifts in to gears

And 0 to 100 she’s submerged 

Submerged in memories 

Contorted with an assortment 

Of emotion 

Drowning in an ocean 

Of her own eye sockets 

Her eye lids are irritated from the salt 

And swollen 

Because 

She cries 

With 

No tears 

Shes learned to float 

She spells hope: “P-A-I-N” 

And has reclused 

For 

What purpose is 

Pressing toward the end 

When a heart missing parts 

Is impossible to mend 

Woe has become her friend 

And tears flood her bed 

Until she 

Pulls the plug from the sun 

For it seems to always be night 

She’s not even sure 

Anymore 

Which way is right 

Well, no one knows. 

For she’s just a shell 

Haunted by the ghost 

Of Ms. Jones 

Timeline 

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We exist 

But In an influx of timelines 

And our lives are made up 

Of a bunch of circumstances 

That’s timed right 

Because if not it might 

Cause you to live 

In a totally different reality 

I mean one thing 

One thought

One action 

Could lead to a life simply 

Over-lapping 

THe life you would’ve had 

If you had just made the written choice 

I wonder how many times 

How many times we’ve torn up the invoice 

The invoice that tells us the contents of our lives 

How many times men have re-written their wives

How many times women changed the guy 

The guys they would meet 

Because they chose to kiss or sleep 

To stay or flee 

Small choices majorly with impacts 

That we will never return from 

For how will we know that we changed a moment 

If every time we breathe 

A new timeline is born from 

The inevitable chance to erase the re-run 

Of re-writing the timeline we’ve forsaken 

Crazy ain’t it? 

Genuine 

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I watched you change

There were so many late nights 

Where trips to Georgia would feel like moments 

For we’d burn hours with conversation 

You told me of your quest for happiness 

In spite of pain 

And of frustration 

And I Knew then you were a warrior 

You saw the way your family fell apart 

And the thought that 

It could trickle down to your Littles some day 

Did colossal damage to your heart 

The problem 

The problem is that you had no idea where to start 

So like anyone else with too much on their plate 

You did nothing. 

And you sucked in all the awful things that life presented you 

And you mixed them with your Hennessy 

You laced your marijuana with your pain 

And you didn’t have to say it 

For I knew you didn’t care anymore 

I knew you had given up 

I knew the pain had won

And it’s almost as if 

You reaching out for me 

To explain to you how to fix it 

Was more of a test 

For when I answered your beckon 

It must have been too late 

Or maybe you changed your mind

Or maybe in the chaos you found happiness 

Maybe it’s where you felt you belonged 

Because all the talks we had about not succumbing to our circumstances 

Was just talk 

Hot air 

A facade to get me off your back 

As you indulged in the very lifestyle that Robbed you of a proper home 

So like the running tally of friends that I had 

I guess I’ll never know 

If your faith was indeed genuine 

Chained 

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Sobbing

All I can see is her sobbing

I close my eyes and she’s sobbing

Riddled with the spiraling vortex that is her past

She wants so bad to let it go

But she’s chained to the persuasion that says she should be buried in her hurt 

She doesn’t know love

She never felt love

There’s a hole in her torso where her heart should be

And though I am an outsider to an intrinsic problem 

And objector to an existential problem

I wanted so badly to vicariously stop them 

But I peered into her hurting eyes and in the process 

I realized I couldn’t do it

I realized that I couldn’t take the pain away

I realized that the only one that could administer the change was Jesus

Oh how badly I wanted to bring her to the pond

Oh how badly I wanted Her to drink the water

But sometimes a stubborn horse would rather die of thirst than obey

And sometimes we as people would rather abide in pain

That may be because sometimes we’ve been deprived of praise

And we treat life like another blank page that no one would dare to write on

I wanted to tell her to ride on

To be strong

To hang in there because it will get better

But will it?

How much more of this can she take

Before she breaks

And her world falls apart like a category 10 earthquake

I see a painful future

I can feel the pain through her

As the malevolent rhetoric called her past 

Does everything it can to woo her 

It’s her tears that soothe her 

But what a sewer they trickle down to

Where do you find hope in hopelessness

Where do you find closure in  brokenness

I am just hoping that 

I can be the light she needs

Rest Easy Homie 

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Do you ever wonder

Do you ever wonder what it would have been like if you had stayed? 

I remember a time when the only thing that separated us was baseball and a couple of grades

Shoot, we were a week away from celebrating the same birthday 

But oh how there is an oasis between us

A great span of philosophy and circumstances

School loans and work advances

And if I’m being 100 I have no idea how we managed to stay friends this long

I’m not sure if it’s longevity or because there’s a purpose

I just remember having this fear that to you I would be worthless

Because Jesus was no longer the glue that held our friendship together

And the day you told me that you are agnostic at best

Atheist at worst

I remember when my dad was battling that rape charge 

but you leaving the faith took the cake on what hurts

It felt as if I Lost my brother

The greatest accountability partner that I ever had 

One text message made you become a stranger

There was hurt coupled with anger

And I feared that we walked a tight rope that 

would cause us to  fall to the death of our friendship

To be honest, I was waiting for you to end it

You have found people who were also decreasing in spiritual stamina

And I feared that God would have to take drastic measures to get his hands on you

Don’t get this Poem wrong 

I couldn’t be more proud of you

Alongside me as we battled the status quo to become great

To supersede the statistics that said we would die before graduation 

It’s really quite an achievement

So nigga we made it

Not just for our societal standing 

But for our friendship 

And though I hurt from time to time at the thought of you

You can be rest assured

That I’ll forever be in your corner 

For after all

What are brothers for?